No instrument, but I could certainly sing my patootie off for u!

I’m still looking for the headless 5-string Bass with on-board amps-cabs-effects.

A electric guitar with 7 single coil pickups, super scalloped frets, and headless

Smart LED Fretboard Illumination System.
Imagine a Donner guitar equipped with an integrated, low-profile LED system embedded directly into the fretboard. Precision RGB LEDs beneath each fret marker and along the fret wires illuminate in real time to visually map scales, modes, chords, and arpeggios directly on the neck. Using a companion app or onboard controls, players can select any key, scale (major, minor, pentatonic, Dorian, Mixolydian, etc.), or harmonic framework. The LEDs then light up the exact notes and finger positions required, color-coded for clarity (e.g., root notes in one color, scale tones in another, tensions in a third). As you play along to backing tracks or lessons, the system can pulse or shift colors to guide you through the changes in real time.

I’ve got an innovative idea for a new instrument that’s going to revolutionize the industry and put Donner on the fast track for ultimate success. If you’re a guitarist that tries to play a piano, you find that it’s hard to transition to having a separate set of keys for for your sharps and flats, right? At the same time, the biggest craze in heavy metal music these days Extended Range Guitars with additional strings. So the natural progression to bring the piano sound to an instrument that guitarists can quickly adapt to, right? In addition, we’re tired of our fret hand being in pain all the time from fretting different gauges of strings and holding your fingers at awkward angles. Introducing the Guano! It’s a guitar with 88 strings, just like a fine grand piano, and no pesky frets! Imagine having every note of the piano tucked under your arm, and you barely have to stretch at all to pluck those high notes! But wait, you’re saying you want it to have multiple courses so that it sounds closer to a real piano? Then get ready because here comes the Guano Pro with 240 strings clustered together to form the 88 notes of a concert piano! I can hear you asking now, “but what if I want to have pitch bends like on a guitar?” Don’t worry because Guano Pro has a tremolo bridge that takes only six men of average strength to to pitch down! What about portability? Don’t you worry your pretty head about that because Guano Pro comes with a custom Guano strap so you can distribute the weight across your back and shoulder like a regular guitar. At a reasonable 831 pounds, you’ll barely notice this lightweight instrument affecting the curvature of your spine. If you want piano sound with the ease of a guitar, you want Guano and Guano Pro! Now available for the low low price of $298,995! Guano; We’re not shitting you!

Double neck guitar (guitar plus short scale bass). For those that want to use a looper and have access to both guitar and bass tones.

A version of the MEDO, called the MIDIDO or MIDI DUDE that is a MIDI/CV hub that allows for a variety of expressive devices to connect to it. So, for example, I would connect two synth modules, as well as my traditional MIDI keyboard controller, but I would be able to control the modulation and other parameters via a series of devices. Some devices might be wearable while playing the keyboard, other devices might be controlled by light or motion sensors…you could even get extra experimental with odd sensors like one component that reads the environment (temperature, humidity, etc.). There is an abundance of types of sensors that are not being utilized in music. Right now there is a seperate device for putting water or a candle on a guitar pedal, and there are weird keyboards like the Roli Arturia types, but nobody is making a really smart MIDI brain that goes way beyond simple clock control, and expand on the notion of all types of controllers, but one central brain that can be more future-proof than the novelty of one controller or another. I want something like the MEDO but that can control my analog synth in a more open-ended and inspiring way.

A ukulele but the color is like the ocean… the head to the base of the neck is blue and it fades into a beige color for the sand… the strings are clear… and the body is shaped sort of like a surfboard. The tuning pegs are shark fins.

I would love to see Donner make a portable yet functional analog mixer. I think also simpler noise devices like a Spring Noise Box or one of those speed controlled rotary fan drone machines. Another very great idea would be to make a little compact desktop sized true Spring Reverb Tank that you use as a stand-alone fx unit or place it into the Send of any mixer. A very clangorous, wet, drippy metallic over-the-top Spring Reverb Tank

A oboe replacing it’s own reed

Shoe synth: Ever get tired of long boring exercise sessions? Tired of the same boring old playlist or that book you’ve read for the thousandth time? The Shoe Synth is a revolutionary new instrument designed to augment your next mundane activity. Whether cooking beats in the studio, pumping iron or pounding the pavement, the Shoe Synth allows you to create unlimited musical experiences by simply moving your feet! Each step creates a randomly calibrated sound by taking the first point of contact of the Shoe and ground coupled with the exact amount of force you exerted. This allows for infinite creativity. Say goodbye to the mundane and hello to Shoe Synth!

A Hush X Bass

A guitar that amplifies thoughts and has no strings.
The Thinkaster

It looks like you’d expect but it’s actually very different. Aside from holding it to express yourself – it actually doesn’t exist or make sound.
You just have to be really quiet to master it.

It IS The preferred instrument of most religious Monks and high ranking political figures unfortunately – but it has a distinct timbre to it which has a tendency to subconsciously mind control whoever hears it being played.

IT NOW COMES IN SEA FOAM SICKNESS GREEN

“Electric guitar” made from the harp of an upright piano. Piezo pickups on the harp itself, magnetic pickups over the strings, knobs and switches to mix and mute the two signals, 2 output jacks for configurable panning (high/low notes, pickup position, etc.)

Fractal burn

Fart instrument. Works like a brass instrument but the sound is a fart with different pitches

I use a big metal coffee can with a 1×1×14″ stick bolted to the side, bottom of can goes up with wood attatched, an old guitar string thru a pin hole, ball end inside of can, and ran up to a hinge on top of wood stick to flex the string for a twangy noise, its a twanger. Metal coffee cans are not very common anymore. It goes good with a slide whistle.

Design and sell plug and play MIDI based kits to add physical drum triggers (pneumatic striker or something) to any drum kit, assign them a track, and have it play the “Snare MIDI Track” on the physical snare. Begin here and make base and expandable kits for drums, and branch into other insturments so people can make robot bands/orchestrion, or concentrate sampling on a single insturment or kit.
For reference see “Pat Methaney Orchestrion” clips on youtube, because it’s an entire world of economic opportunity.

A guitar with a built in looper, drum and bass machine

The Bass Kazoo-Coder is a synthesized Kazoo tuned in the bass range. It is played by blowing into a Kazoo-type mouthpiece connected to a 25 key analog monosynth with 2 filter types. The sound is reminiscent of a classic vocoder with the fuzzy quality of a Kazoo played through an envelope filter.

Ship a guitar case filled with toy spring snakes.

A guitar with robotic tuners (similar to a popular brand that starts with g). These tuners randomly tune the guitar to different tunings such as standard, drop, d, open tunings, etc. As a player, you have to quickly adapt

An effects stompbox, brightly colored, bearing the logo “THE ULTIMATE TONE SOLUTION!”. It has a standard DC input, a 1/4" input jack…but no output jack. And there’s just one knob labeled “YES!” on the right and “NO!” if turned to the left.

Of course, there’s nothing inside. No circuit boards. The DC and input aren’t connected to anything inside. And the knob’s pot has that same problem… it’s not connected to anything because there’s nothing to connect TO.

MSRP should be…oh, $999.95. Typical box presentation, but the pedal should be packed in a Ziploc bag with several stale peanuts, noting that these are New Caledonian “Tone Nuts” and for optimal usage, the pedal should remain IN the bag, WITH the “Tone Nuts”.

As to how to connect the pedal with it still in the Ziploc bag, the manual (which should have no actual translation, but the only directions that DO appear need to keep drifting randomly into several other languages) simply says to put the input and DC connectors in the general vicinity of the pedal. It never says to actually CONNECT them, of course.

Then on the inside of the pedal, put in several smoked cigarette butts and a sticker that reads “RAUSCHEN VORBEI!”. And make sure to screw down the pedal back with two different types of screws…such as having three of them be a normal Phillips, but the LAST one should be some obscure Torx type.

And there you have it. THE ULTIMATE TONE SOLUTION…named as such because it’s incapable of producing ANY tone whatsoever! 🤣